newsletter [2]

The year is almost done and the holiday season is approaching - where did the year go!

In understanding of the rush that happens o­n Christmas Morning we found a great breakfast recipe that you prepare in advance!

This month we bring an article from a guest writer o­n ten ways to keep your expectations from making you crazy at Christmas. Another guest writer writes about Christmas in the world of the ever changing family

And finally a Merry Christmas goes out to all our readers who celebrate it. May this season bring you close to those you love and find you safe.

10 Ways to Keep Your Expectations From Making You Crazy This Christmas

Written by: Pamela Cole Harris [3]
Web Site: Home and Garden Makeover [4]

Christmas is a wonderful time! Everyone is full of good cheer, the milk of human kindness and 20 pounds of candy. All gifts are given with love, are exactly the right size, are exactly the right color,
or exactly the right thing for exactly the price you could afford. Right?

Well, if YOUR Christmas seems to fall short every year, here are some ways to keep your
sanity and enjoy the unexpected joys that the season brings.

1. News Flash! You are not perfect! Nor is your family! Give up the myth that they should
   be!
2. Don’t make the season complicated! Simplify! While elaborate decorations may appeal to your decorating ego, putting them up takes time and energy that may be best spent elsewhere this Christmas.
3. Everything doesn’t have to be homemade. Pies, cakes and cookies are perfectly acceptable if they are bought at a bakery. And your children just might celebrate if you decide not to make that knitted scarf this year!
4. Relax. Take time out from the hustle and bustle to just sit with a cup of tea or cocoa and read. Or take a long hot bath. If you take some time for yourself, you will be better able to cope with the holiday chaos.
5. Let other people pitch in. You are not the o­nly o­ne who can do Christmas! Ask someone to do tasks you usually do, such as make the eggnog or cookies. And then LET THEM DO IT – even if they don’t do it just the way you want! Don’t constantly look over their shoulder.
6. Don’t make the season an ordeal for your children by expecting perfect behavior.
   Children can easily be overloaded with the food, sights, expectations and social
   whirlwind of the season. Again, simplify for their sake — and yours!
7. If you can afford to hire a cleaning service before company comes for Christmas,
   do it! Give it to yourself as a Christmas present! You will enjoy the season more
   because you won’t be worn out from scrubbing that tile with a toothbrush!
8. If you can’t afford to pay cash for a gift, wait until next year to buy it.
   Save for the gift in the meantime. The short term thrill of buying the gift will
   be more than overpowered by the struggle to pay it off months into the new year.
9. Get out of the house and walk when you begin to feel stress. It will help you calm
   down and keep off those extra pounds. And it will give your family a break from
   you!
10. Don’t do guilt – to yourself and others. Don’t use your expectations of the season as a weapon against your friends and family. Enjoy what comes this season. It may not be what you expected – it may be better!

And remember – love doesn’t come wrapped in paper, or tied with a bow. You can’t get it for $19.95 if you call now or for two easy payments of o­nly… you name the price. But love is but in the corners of a small child’s smile, the twinkle of a mother’s eye or the drape of an arm across your shoulder. If you are expecting something else, you just might fail to recognize it! How
crazy!

Pamela Cole Harris is an editor and writer with 35 years experience. Visit her website, http://www.homeandgardenmakeover.com [5], for her unique view of home decorating and remodeling (and a free monthly newsletter!). 

December's Recipes

Christmas Brunch Casserole

• 1 pound bacon
• 1 tablespoon butter
• 2 o­nions, chopped
• 2 cups fresh sliced mushrooms
• 4 cups frozen hash brown potatoes, thawed
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 1/4 teaspoon garlic salt
• 1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper
• 4 eggs
• 1 1/2 cups milk
• 1 pinch dried parsley
• 1 cup shredded Cheddar cheese

1. This is best made the day before. Prepare it o­n Christmas Eve and just pop it in the oven Christmas morning!
2. Preheat oven to 400 degrees F. Grease a 9x13 inch casserole dish.
3. Place bacon in a skillet. Cook over medium high heat until evenly brown. Drain and set aside.
4. In a separate skillet, melt the butter and fry o­nions and mushrooms until tender.
5. Place potatoes in bottom of prepared dish. Sprinkle with salt, garlic salt, and pepper.
6. Top with bacon, then o­nions and mushrooms.
7. In a large bowl, beat eggs with milk and parsley. Pour over casserole.
8. Top with grated cheese. Cover and refrigerate overnight.
9. Bake in preheated oven for 1 hour or until set. If preparing and baking the same day, cook for 45 minutes.

Caramel Shortbread Squares

• 2/3 cup butter, softened
• 1/4 cup white sugar
• 1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
• 1/2 cup butter
• 1/2 cup packed light brown sugar
• 2 tablespoons light corn syrup
• 1/2 cup sweetened condensed milk
• 1 1/4 cups milk chocolate chips

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F .
2. In a medium bowl, mix together 2/3 cup butter, 1/4 cup white sugar, and 1 1/4 cup flour until evenly crumbly.
3. Press into 9" square baking pan that has been greased and floured.
4. Bake for 20 minutes.
5. In a 2 quart saucepan, combine 1/2 cup butter, brown sugar, corn syrup, and sweetened condensed milk.
6. Bring to a boil. Continue to boil for 5 minutes.
7. Remove from heat and beat vigorously with a wooden spoon for about 3 minutes.
8. Pour over baked crust (cooled).
9. Cool until it begins to firm.
10. Melt chocolate and pour over caramel layer.
11. Cover the layer completely.
12. Chill. Cut into small squares before the chocolate hardens

A Double Dose of Christmas

Written by: Jill Curtis [6]
Web Site: familyonwards [7]

The season of goodwill, for most of us, is o­n its way. The run up to Christmas might well be charged with worrying about choosing the 'right' gift for the 'right' person, trying to guess how much people will eat and drink, and counting the number of beds which will be filled. But for many families who have been split by separation and divorce it can be overshadowed by anxiety about where the celebrations will take place, and where the children will spend the festivals. Of all the possible areas of conflict after the breakup of a family the question of 'Where will the children be for Christmas?' is probably very high o­n many parents' list.

Why does Christmas have such a special feel about it? Why do so many of us want to be 'home for Christmas?' Why do we all, whatever our age, still hold o­n to the feeling that there is a special magic around at this time of the year? Quite possibly we all have deep inside us memories of the excitement which went with our own childhood Christmases - the gradual build up at school, the familiar carols, the bright lights in the shops, and the breathtaking moment when at last we were allowed to open our stocking. Perhaps it is this excitement that we would like to hand o­n to our children.

We probably gave up o­n Father Christmas a long time ago, but even families who do not rub along happily for most of the year will, sometimes with fingers crossed, come together over the holidays. Adult 'children' who have long left home and value their independence will usually try to make a visit home, even though the reason o­n the surface is 'Mum and Dad expect it'. And even this can become complicated by deciding whether to visit 'his' parents or 'hers'. Multiply that by a proliferation of parents and stepparents and the difficulties and tensions increase. So, too, do the number of traditional Christmas meals which have to be eaten!

For families with a constellation of relationships juggling everyone's schedule can be fraught with difficulties. If there are 'his', 'hers' and 'our' children to consider it is hard to accept that it may be impossible to please everyone. A family settling down to becoming a 'new' family may feel
torn apart again when o­ne of the children leaves to be with the 'other' parent over the holiday. A family divorce may mean heartache for grandparents who are suddenly not allowed to share in the fun of a family holiday with their grandchildren.

Of course decisions have to be made, but the wisest of fathers and mothers accept that - whether their child is three or twenty-three (or even fifty-three) there are still more than 360 other days in the year: so they may well find they have the undying gratitude of a child who was not uprooted every Christmas holiday to spend time with each parent just to keep the record straight. A double Christmas? That may work for some families, but as father of three, Joshua, told me: 'Arguing
over where the children opened their presents was dreadful for us all. Eventually, I left them with their Mum o­n the understanding that I had them for the New Year. So goodbye Father Christmas, but I do know they will have a Mother Christmas, and the kids deserve that.'

Of course, plans do have to be made for very small children. But what about when they get a little older? Can we take a peek at their lists for Santa and perhaps learn where they would like to be o­n the day? The greatest gift we can give a child - of any age - at this time of the year is to listen carefully and let them be where they are going to be happiest o­n the 25th December.

© Jill Curtis 2002

Well folks, that's it for another month. As usual, if you have any suggestions or contributions
let me know! We're always up to suggestions and recipes sent in also have the chance to be included o­n the website.

Jill Lassaline, editor
Single Parents World